Tit Bit : Life as it is now . . . . . take 1. . . . .

I, Crazeebee . . . . ..

. . . . . . am wrapping up things on my current project. Bitter sweet as I can see my Legacy of what I have accomplished. I can see the bright future of the project that I am now walking away from. I am leaping into a brand new project as its new leadership. I will be responsible for a large amount of people and painting a vision for them to deliver. In the normal scheme of things, in the next 2 years would have seen this happen. It is now in front of me earlier than what was expected and I am jumping in. . . . . .

. . . . . . am gearing up for a mini break away! I will be spending time in the warm KZN area in South Africa by the ocean. This is the east coast of South Africa. I can feel the need for the ocean’s healing properties and anchoring that I am connected to greatness, wisdom and limitless opportunities and blessings . . . . . . . . .

. . . . . . am having a little, intimate birthday celebration for my birthday on the 21st July. There will be some old familiar pals and some new additions to the circle. One them being the current Wiseman Nos 8 in my life! Hehehehehehehe. His humor and wit would be soooooo welcome at my party. I love the fact that I get to enjoy the bonds in my life. And that is what at the end of the day makes my Birthday so special. I get to celebrate the bonds I have that allow for honest healing interaction with some very special people . . . . . . . .

. . . . . .have picked up weight again! I guess the penny has still not dropped for me! When you obsessively control an aspect, the minute you breathe and set it free, you will need to swing to the other side before you settle on the happy middle ground. The “pendulum” effect is always in play when you over control an aspect. The minute you let go, expect the swing to the opposite. I fully identify with my Heroine Oprah on her weight battles. I am loving the whole approach of understanding your relationship to food and not to diet! I am drawn to the teachings of Geneen Roth. So will explore that option. . . . . . . .



. . . . . . am seeing a bigger picture to me! I am looking at my talents and celebrating that. I am paying more attention to what brings me pleasure and looking at more of those moments in a given day . . . . . .

. . . . . . am enjoying some interesting times with my family. For some reason, there are now rewarding, special moments creeping in. My relationship with my Dad is moving from protected, highly sensitive and superficial to one of deeper meaningful chats. One where he is seeing me for the first time as a person not a child he was lumped that he had to adopt and raise as his own as part of the marrying my Mom package. My relationship with my Mom is moving to one with less secrets, more honest discussion and me being more myself with less fear of hurting her. A new understanding has entered my relationship with my siblings in how the way I judge them is how the world around me judges me! A scary discovery of late. It is not all great moments with my family as I am still working through my anger of feeling this responsibility to making their lives a great quality (sometimes it feels like it is at the expense of my happiness) to live although it really is on them to do so and not me . . . . . .

. . . . . . .have had limited results in The Men space! Well it feels like that! Been a drought over the past few weeks. Both Wiseman Nos 7 and Nos 8 in my life are straight with girlfriends. LOL! How is that for keeping it clean and not complicated? I cannot deny that we have pretty special connections that are really great. We are definitely emotionally connected but not physically. And something tells me that it has something to do with me accepting and approving of my body as it is today! It is linked to me being open to possibilities! It is also linked to me starting to nourish myself they way I lovingly nourish my work, my teams, my family and friends! And let me tell you that the resistance is strong in this department! So onward I press on! And NO, I am under no illusion of when I achieve the right mindset that these men magically turn gay! I appreciate that they are merely messengers of aspects I need to note . . . . . . . .



. . . . . . . . celebrate gratitude, love and a blessed existence up to now. May it continue as I journey on.

xoxo