The version of Truth you follow!

We all have have degrees of judgement within us.  We have the ability to take in what is in front of us, form an opinion based on all that we believe and make a conclusion.  What I truly find fascinating is how judgement to the world, people, situations are all a reflection of how we judge ourselves!  And on a deeper level, how knowing the truth of who we are has such significant influence on the degree of judgement we unleash on ourselves!

So what is this knowing truth mean for us?  Say someone came up to you and told you they thought you were a freak because you had bright blue skin!  Depending on your personality, the more or less bottom line would be to let that judgement bounce right off you as your truth is that your skin is definitely not bright blue so a freak you are not!  That is their issue in what they see and not yours.  Life goes on!  Your truth is strong, simple and unbreakable.  Your skin is not bright blue.  Simple as that!  The world can say what it may . . . . .

Now try on these ones on to see if they fit snuggly!  You are not worthy because your body is not perfect!  Sharing what you think is a sure way to show what an idiot you are!  Having X or Y makes you something!  I sense that for most, this hits a sore spot.  All those perfect bodies we see in magazines and on TV.  The lavish lifestyles of the reality stars we see on TV that  make our lives seem so non glamorous thus not worthy.  The constant comparing, envying the "happy" , "gorgeous" people who get all the luck, the best jobs, the money, the constant admirers and just the good life!

I will admit the above is more subtle and not as clear cut as someone telling you that your skin is bright blue!  But what for me what makes it tricky is that on some level, we have to believe there is an element of truth to it.  That is the only reason for me why we would buy into it, feel crap for not living up to it and end up concluding that we simply just not good enough as we are.

For the unaware, it drives behaviour to meet the goal.  So we diet, or punish our bodies with bad eating, or snip and cut it or simply give up on it and hide away.  When we realise that all we really after is acceptance and approval from ourselves, we have somewhere to start.  Then begins your journey to understand what is your truth.  Then begins your call to trust your truth and live by it.

I have realised that over time, I have come to accept my masculinity a bit deeper as the days go by.  Being gay was probably the easier part.  Feeling that as a man I was worthy was the bigger issue for me.  So judgement of others for me being different hurt.  It hurt so bad because I believed those judgements to be true.  My inner harsh voice, was being amplified and echoed by the outside world. 

It was when I decided to start looking at what it meant to be a man, that I started seeing my value as a person.  That the definition of man handed to me by my parents, my community, even my closest and dearest friends was not the definition that I felt was the one that fitted me.  And so I decided to understand what it meant to be a great man for myself and now that I am getting comfortable with that truth, my judgement of me is lightening up.

So I understand, that to really be ok with being judged means that you get ok with your truth.  By knowing your truth, you love yourself as you are more which really leaves no space for judgement.  I now see how this is applying to the lesson of Wiseman Nos 7.  There is a truth to knowing the beauty of my body.  I am still unpacking it and have my blocks that need my love and patience.  But I get that for me to be loved and accepted physically for who I am, it starts with my willingness to release judgement on my body as it is now.  It is freakin hard and I have soooooo much resistance to releasing it but I see the first step.  The willingness to release the judgement and simply take it from there . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Begin to open the door to knowing your truth.  It goes a long way to help you love yourself and release all that self imposed judgement we can so easily rake up!  At the end of the day, you really need to ask which version of the truth you follow . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . that of your core soul or the world's?